Flossy is well known to many on the British Dressage Forum as a teller of interesting stories and perhaps the odd joke or two. We have selected a few tales for your pleasure.

Missing Husband

Missing Husband
 
A Dressage Diva  reported that her Dressage Husband  is missing.
A police officer  arrived  at the country house mansion,  to take some details  and his first question was when   our Dressage Diva first noticed that her husband was not where he should be, her reply was that  this morning when  she was about to go to a show she realized some thing was a miss because her boots were not polished, but in hindsight from the pile of dishes in the sink he must have been gone for several days.
“Excuse me madam” the policeman interrupted  “ at night at  bed time  have you not noticed  his absence?   “  notice his what ? ??  my husband had very little noticeable  in bed time  Sir”  was the reply.
the policeman  asked for some details  “how tall is  your husband  madam”  to which she replied  “I don't know how tall he is  170cm, 160cm,  how tall husbands are?”
“colour of his eyes?”     “NO IDEA”     “hair?”   “NOT SURE    if he has any”
“what was he wearing ?”      “ BLUE JEANS,  NO GREEN CORDS , NO, I THINK HIS,,,,,  ,  I COULD NOT TELL  YOU   I really don't know”
 
 
“So  what was your husband doing the last time you saw  him?”  was the police mans  next  question.
“Last time  I saw him He was holding my 4 year old   16,2    black stallion ,the one with  the small star and two white front socks,  the one that I just bought the HKB  patent leather   diamante brow band   bridle for, I  remember that well because I just told  my husband  off, for spilling hoof oil on the  white  silver lined   bandages  which now don't match  the bling on my Cavallino   close contact brown  crocodile  leather boots”
“Do you think I could talk to the stable staff? “ the policeman inquired  ,  “ Oh   actually now that you mentioned it I have not seen her for a while too”